Getting ready for the holidays…

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Living abroad far away from your family has its ups and downs, pros and cons. Your new friends become family and family your first thought when planning vacations. 

Last spring, I enjoyed a one month long sabbatical earned after five years working at PayPal. Visiting our family was at the top of the list, same as traveling to new cities in the world. It was a no-brainer, let’s travel to new cities with all our family, I thought. It was the best trip ever and I will write about it in a later post, just check this pic. This time around is different, this season is one of the most important in our culture, thus we have decided to spend it celebrating posadas, Christmas, singing carols, drinking “ponche” and sharing time with the ones we love the most in the place that saw us grow.

I’m sure our little girl will enjoy it big time, she and her cousins will be at the center of everything, during Christmas and on New Year’s Eve. This is the first time they will meet, they will touch their hands and most likely will get a Hi or Bye from my little one. This is our next generation, the next from both sides of the family, the next that will carry our blood and names, the next that will enjoy the world we live in today.

As always, there is some sense of uncertainty and stress when planning these trips, but I’m sure that it will go as smooth as the one back in Spring. I think everything is about respect, dialog and making sure that everybody’s voice is heard. 

For sure we will miss our family in the Silicon Valley, we have shared one more year of laughter, feasts, hard training and early morning races. We will be far physically but close in heart. We will be back to share stories about the trip including two weddings, one baptism, some posadas, baby Jesus birthday party, year end celebration and Acapulco baby.

For me a sign of complete success will be our families getting together once again, the little one learning about our traditions and getting back recharged for 2016.

Traveling with our family has been always the best decision, something that should always be at the top of anyone’s list.

Before saying good night, I want to send a message to my friends and family. #Goya

And yes, those ugly sweaters in the picture are meant to be ugly and win a contest.

Heritage, heredity and heir

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According to the Oxford Dictionaries,

Heritage: Valued objects and qualities such as cultural traditions, unspoiled countryside, and historic buildings that have been passed down from previous generations.

Heredity: The passing on of physical or mental characteristics genetically from one generation to another.

Heir: A person legally entitled to the property or rank of another on that person’s death.

It’s not a secret that my heir’s heritage is full of beautiful traditions like Semana Santa, Posadas, Día de Muertos, tamales,  mariachis, guacamole, mole, tacos, chiles en nogada and much more. It is something that she will grow up with, that I hope she takes as her own and passes over to the next generations. This is what make us who we are, how we think, how we see the world and act every day of our lives.

I’m sure that as a Mexican-American kid she we will also grow with other traditions, like Independence Day on July 4, Veterans Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving or the NFL Super Bowl.

Nonetheless, there are some things transmitted by heredity, those that come in our DNA and can’t be taught. The name of the game is win, the rivalry Pumas – América. It’s hard to explain, may be like a Celtics vs. Lakers, 49ers vs. Seahawks or Yankies vs. Red Sox. There is no game between these two teams that is not entertaining and nerve-racking.

Sunday’s 10am Pacific Time are becoming a tradition, just after swimming class the family gets together to watch a Pumas game, today we played America and beat them in the Liga MX semi-finals. 

The best part of beating America is reminding them about it, I’m not encouraging hate or bulling, just a friendly reminder of who is who. Yes, not always has been like this, yes, today was not our best game, but we will enjoy the moment and get ready for the Liga MX Championship games.  

Dear heir, I know you already enjoy soccer, are passionate about it and cheer for our local team, but I’m sure one day our DNA will pop to show where your soccer futbol heart really is. #Goya

  

What is Thanksgiving?

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After some research on the true meaning of the Thanksgiving holiday, I found this website which I think describes the celebration holisticly, from a Native People of North American perspective, the Pilgrims and even from a religious point of view. Below is an excerpt for you, however you can read the full story here.

Giving thanks for the Creator’s gifts had always been a part of Wampanoag daily life. From ancient times, Native People of North America have held ceremonies to give thanks for successful harvests, for the hope of a good growing season in the early spring, and for other good fortune such as the birth of a child. Giving thanks was, and still is, the primary reason for ceremonies or celebrations.

The arrival of the Pilgrims and Puritans brought new Thanksgiving traditions to the American scene. Today’s national Thanksgiving celebration is a blend of two traditions: the New England custom of rejoicing after a successful harvest, based on ancient English harvest festivals; and the Puritan Thanksgiving, a solemn religious observance combining prayer and feasting.” 

For me Thanksgiving means expressing gratitude and sharing. Gratitud for my friends in this journey, friends I consider my extended family and have shown their care for my two girls. Sharing everything, our home, time, food, laughter, more food and even prayers. 

This year we continued the “tradition”, Thursday at 8am everyone ready for the Silicon Valley Turkey Trot 10k. Probably the little one doesn’t have a clue why we are doing this, however I am sure than one day she will appreciate the fact that she has participated in it since she was born. Yes, we were sleepy, hungry, it was cold, windy, but it was also the continuation of something we started a year ago – and our friends were there too. 10k is a small sacrifice for all the eating that was ahead of us, a mix of traditional Thanksgiving turkey with a Mexican spin, including guacamole, mole, wild rice, salad, spaghetti, cranberries sauce and some desserts.   As the host, I was honored to cut the turkey, a task that might seem easy but in reality turkeys have some body parts very oddly placed. Obviously I had the help of two of the best chefs I have met, that made the task very easy to tackle. But the most important part of the day was sharing the table with those I love the most, our friends, our extended family which is always there while we are far away from those that gave us birth.

The feast started with a very gentle “Gracias” from the youngest in the room, my dear daughter who played with the other kids until she heard “Can’t feel my face by The Weeknd” opening the dance floor. We shared stories of years past, we created new stories for years to come like the stolen pecan pie and we sang along with a Kareoke night.

This is what Thanksgiving means to me, expressing gratitude for what we have “harvested”, friendship, love and sharing it with those I care and care for me.

Oh, and if you wondered, the little one can rock till late hours, she went to bed at the same time as the last one at home. I hope that at 16 she goes to bed before me, ha.

Never hurt her again

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Once my mother said that there is no bigger love than the one you feel for your own kids, she assured me that one day I would understand. That day has come, I felt it, I felt it big time.

The day she was born was full of joy, new amazing things were happening to us, we were building a new family and I was astonished with what Mother Nature can do. Almost a year and a half has past, she has grown from a little room-sharing newborn to an amazing baby full of energy and smiles that occasionally shares our bed – very occasionally.

Newborns cry, that is the only way they have to get our attention, if they are hungry, if they want to sleep, if a diaper change is needed or if they just want a hug to get warmer at night, they just cry, that’s nature and parents have a sixth sense to identify what’s going on.

However, there is a kind of cry you know comes from pain. I remember them very clear as if they were a re-play in my head, first when she got her first immunization at the age of 2 months, second when she got her ears pierced at 2.5 months old and third when she and I had an accident at home just about the same time.

That feeling is indescriptible, it is a mixture of feelings that make you dizzy. Just to give you a taste of it I felt powerless, abandoned, disoriented, tense, anxious and angry. You may think this is an exaggeration, yet only those with kids of their own will be able to confirm this is an understatement. 

Interestingly enough, those 3 situations were completely different from each other and my feelings were pretty much the same. While the immunization was for health reasons, the ear piercing was more of a personal choice and the accident totally my fault.

As she grows I see her stronger, enjoying things that make her happy and being careful with things that hurt her. She is too young to understand sometimes pain comes from things that are not physical in nature. I hope when she learns about those feelings she also remembers  I will be standing next to her, I promise.

  

Music lessons for your infant

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All starts every Saturday at 7:30am, everybody up and getting ready for music lessons.

Some say music is good at all ages, even when your heir is still inside the womb. I have read a lot of articles about it, some say it is good for their brain development, others say that its real benefits haven’t been confirmed, there are even articles about how infants respond to music  and Youtube videos like the Emotional Baby.

While the direct benefits of music are yet to be confirmed, we decided that music lessons in her early life were a good idea. My problem was not paying attention during the music class selection process – you snooze, you lose they say or for my Spanish speaking readers “camarón que se duerme, se lo lleva la corriente”.

I’m going to leave aside the singing skills of our music teacher, she plays the guitar, she has fun with the kids, she is patient with them and the parents,  she dances with the class and she prepares her lessons in advance, we were even given a CD with all the songs and a book with the lyrics to sing along.

I thought these lessons were meant for our kid, to develop her brain, her senses, her fine motor skills, but no, these lessons give me the impression that are for parents with no musical or fine motor skills whatsoever.

Kids don’t pay attention to anything for 45 straight minutes, don’t dance, don’t sing along,  they don’t even speak yet, they just run and jump around the room. Meanwhile, moms and dads make music with their hands following the teacher playing guitar, some of us have learned the lyrics already, we dance to the music and fly like butterflies – imagine a group of adults flying around a classroom like butterflies extending their wings – while small bugs run behind you thinking: what’s wrong with my dad?

Doesn’t matter how early we need to wake up, or how ridiculous I feel singing and dancing to this music, I will keep coming. This is one of those things I do because I believe in the positive impact it will have on her and on me, I see it in her smile, her eyes, her moves and the five bees in the beehive she likes mom to sing.

If you have the opportunity to join a music class with your kid go for it, it might develope her or his brain, it might help with fine motor skills or improve their memory, but for sure it will be an opportunity for you to connect with them and fly like a butterfly –  here it is socially accepted.

A new definition for the word “museum”

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A couple of weeks ago we joined the San Jose Children’s Discovery Zoo Museum. Amazing exhibitions, interactive activities, a lot of fun for kids and even for adults playing music tones as we climb the stairs up and down. The membership has its privileges, three adults plus all your kids for a full year, we can bring two guests every day, 50% off general admission on participating museums and more.

It seemed to be a great idea, what is better than spending every weekend with your kid playing around in a Musuem? The first day was a huge celebration of Día de Muertos, we enjoyed great story telling, traditional dances and music, including live mariachis. We were all excited about our new membership, let’s come back every weekend we thought.

Today, as we were showing off our membership card at the main entrance, like we were VIP members of a Yatch club, BAM! What is this? Is this BuyBuyBaby? Is there a stroller sale here or what?

My senses went to DEFCON 1 immediately, nuclear war is imminent. This place was packed like a parking lot in a playoffs’ football game, strollers all over the place, small, big, for twins, all possible brands and colors. How bad  can this be… I thought. Let’s go upstairs to the infants’ section, that’s going to be better.


 What? I felt trapped, without oxygen, like in a coffin.
Who cares? I thought again, this is not for me, this is for kids and she will enjoy it. And she did, she played with everything, the dinner set, the carrousel, the tunnel, stairs up and down, huge plastic cubes, she had a blast. What about me? Avoiding crowds, staring at mean kids pushing my baby, with my face of “get out” to those taking things away from my daughter’s hands, having a blast too.

It was not as bad as it seems, mom, curly hair and I spent an awesome day together. I would do it any day, this is priceless and I’m sure this is creating those experiences that make our live together the best.

If you ever have the opportunity to join a children’s museum, go for it, these are the things worth living for.

Today I have been challenged big time

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Life comes with all sorts of tests, at the beginning we freak out during finals or mid-terms. Then, we join the labor force which presents an interesting gamut of challenges, including some individuals’ personalities, project deadlines, market changes, job ambiguity, etc. 

But today, ambiguity has a new definition, has taken me to a new level and has created the most stressful day with my little loved one.

Yesterday I offered myself to stay at home to take care of the little one who has some fever, at the beginning the plan seemed straightforward, take a couple of work calls, send few emails and then take an online training that was due today. The baby would play around with the tons of toys she has, eat “well” under current circumstances and take the traditional 1pm-ish nap. Hmmm, nothing happened as planned.

This is how today looked like, 🕗🍼👶🏼😢😢😢😢😢🕘😢👶🏼😢🕚😢😢😢😢😢🕛👶🏼🎉🎉😢😢😢🕐👟👟😢😢👣😢😢👶🏼🍪🕑😴🕒😢😢😢📱👶🏼😢😢😢🎾👶🏼😢😢😢🕟😢😢❔⬆️↗️➡️↘️⬇️↙️⬅️❔😢😢😢🍼👶🏼😢😢😢🙋🏼👶🏼😢😢😢🍼😢😢😢👶🏼😴

Oh yes, I finished all the work I planned for today and she kept 😢😢😢 and 👶🏼👶🏼👶🏼

What happened here? This is the first time she is so unpredictable, ambiguous, mood changing…somebody told me, so woman.

The only thing that kept me engaged, understanding, careful and patient was the humongous love I have for her. It is hidden somewhere, I don’t force it, it is simply there to give me the strength I need. Every time I look at her, every time she puts her head on my chest, every time she takes my hand to walk, every time she kisses me with a big mmmmuuuuuaaaa sound.

I will take care of you as long as you allow me to, love you.

My first time at NASDAQ

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Since college I always wanted to work in the financial industry, seemed to be cool and with my engineering background I had big plans for the future. Life took me through many different roads, industries, acquaintances and friends. Today (July 18, 2015), I’m flying to New York to experience one of the biggest events any entrepreneur and business man could dream of, getting your company listed in the stock market – NASDAQ.

I work in the financial industry as I always wanted, in a company which has brought challenges, learnings and joys to my professional career and personal life. Now this company is giving me the opportunity to represent thousands of hard working professionals committed to make this a better world. I am one of ten lucky employees coming to New York with our CEO and Executive Staff to “Ring the Bell” at NASDAQ. 
The expectation is huge, the event  will be streamed online, all employees and share holders will be looking closely to the main event and the stock performance in its first day of trading (for the second time).

I think this is once in a lifetime opportunity, I want to make sure I enjoy every step of the way. I want to share this experience with my family and teammates when I get back. 

UPDATE:

Best day in my professional life, representing thousands of employees in a huge milestone for our company. More here #PYPL

There is no way to quantify how much this experience is really worth, and  I don’t even want to measure it, new friends, mingling with the Execs, New York, etc – just perfect. 

If you ever get a chance to live an experience like this just enjoy it, don’t hold yourself back, feel every moment, take selfies, sing, make friends, friendships that last forever.

 

To my dear friend O

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Siento mucho no poder estar contigo el día de hoy, tu fuiste quien estuvo conmigo durante una de la pérdidas más dolorosas en mi familia. Se que recordaras con mucho pesar este día, pero espero que tu familia y nosotros tus amigos te ayudemos a continuar en este camino que has construido para ti y tu familia.

Recuerdo los días que pasábamos en casa de tus jefes viendo hot-dogs con patas correteando un perico, o simplemente observando la creación de un circuito integrado que cambiaría el mundo.

También las horas interminables de FIFA, las historias de demonios, la despedida de Marco y miles de momentos inolvidables en tu casa (censurados).

Gracias por estar siempre ahí, donde los amigos deben de estar. Espero que sientas lo mismo el día de hoy, que estamos ahí y estaremos para lo que necesites.

Espero verte pronto, y verte que las mismas intenciones de descubrir tu mundo, explorar religiones, pensamientos y nuevas ideas.

Te mando un abrazo y esta pequeña carta.

C ya soon Bro

Finally here…welcome R

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On July the 23rd we had a very nice dinner out and did some shopping for a back to school donation campaign, everything was going according to plan. I was about to open our house door, when suddenly she felt that strange sensation that we were afraid of, her water broke and we enter into an unexplainable, gigantic excitement for what we knew was coming up.

After triple checking that this was not just an “I really need to pee” situation, googling “water breaking experiences” and confirming with our OB what the deal was, we headed out to the hospital like we were going to a Caribbean resort. Yoga ball, 3 days of clothing well packed in a carry-on bag, tooth brush, cologne, gel, baseball cap, cellphone power cords and extra battery chargers, even a swim suit just in case I needed to get a shower with my wife during “early” labor.

We drove for about 15min in complete calm, sharing our thoughts about our new baby, encouraging each other for the new chapter in our lives, and I personally enjoying each moment alongside her, my beautiful wife. We even had time for a few selfies as we were getting into the hospital building.

One and a half hours past since we checked in at our “resort”, no signs of contractions, no signs of baby coming out, a lot of anxiety and we were all set in our hospital room. The big decision needed to be made, oxytocin or wait for natural contractions to kick off. Since her water broke and we needed the baby to come out in a reasonable time, we went ahead with the recommendation for inducing labor. At first, I didn’t know what to expect but I was closely monitoring the baby’s heart and my wife’s contractions in a small screen next to me.

Two more hours past, the worst ever for me, the contractions were constant, her pain was evident. I tried all the techniques I knew to keep her focused, to manage the pain, to work as a team to go through this together. Two long, painful, loud, intense hours, we needed to do something and we did it. While we were lightly against getting the epidural – I had personal reasons to avoid the anesthesia and baby combination, but I felt powerless, alone and with my two beloved ones in a fight for life. The anesthesiologist was kind, knowledgable, she helped me to hold my wife properly, to keep her calmed while she applied the drug. Hmmm, I almost forgot to mention, my wife was asked to read, fill out and sign a waiver while she was screaming of pain, this was the most hilarious and stupid request I’ve ever seen.

Few minutes later, all the pain went away, she was even smiling now. I felt relieved, color came back to my skin, for a moment I was terrified. Now, the only thing I needed to worry about was to make sure she was comfortable, and the baby beat was always present.

Few more hours past, contractions were consistent, nurses always present and taking care of my family. By checking the screen next to me, I knew exactly when the next contraction would happen, it was the perfect coordination from the nurse to ensure the pushing and the contractions were in sync. Contraction by contraction, push by push, I started to spot a little thread of hair, my baby was coming out and it was able to see her.

After a long night, the nurses finally called our OB as the baby was ready to see the light of the day, to meet her mother and father, to let us know how she looks like. All happened in a matter of minutes, first her head, almost at the same time her neck, and in seconds the OB pulled her out. I was astonished, speechless, in shock, my wife tired but her eyes wide open checking for her baby. As I was looking at my baby hugging her mom, I was asked to cut the umbilical cord, I did it without hesitation.

Immediately after, the nurses cleaned the baby up, put her on the scale, took measures, I ran to see her again, talk to her, touch her for the first time. Her eyes were open, she was trying to figure out what just happened. Took me few minutes to realize that in front of me was my baby, our baby, the most beautiful, lovely person I have met in my live.